The SAFE Place Resources

Friends and Family Resources

  • Seek immediate professional help if your friend or child displays any suicidal behaviors or if you are worried about their emotional or physical well-being.
  • Take care of yourself. Educate yourself about sexual assault and the healing process. Realize when you’ve reached your own limitations and encourage your friend or child to talk to a professional.
  • Separate the anger you may feel at your student for having broken any rules or using poor judgment from the anger that you feel at the abuser. The offender is the only one responsible for the assault. No matter how badly you need to vocalize your anger, don’t vent it on your student or other family members.
  • Recognize your student’s need for privacy. Your student’s boundaries have been violated and reclaiming personal space is important. Respect the time and space it takes to heal after a sexual assault

It is okay to tell your friend or loved one that this can be a difficult topic for you to talk about. Let them know that you are open to talk about anything, even if it is uncomfortable.

  • “It’s not your fault.” Survivors can sometimes blame themselves. Assault is never a survivor’s fault.
  • “How can I help you?” Leave the question open so that your loved one feels free to ask for what s/he needs. It can also help the survivor to feel that s/he has more choice.
  • “I support your choices.” In a time of trauma and stress, survivors will often feel like every decision they make could be the wrong one. A place of non-judgmental support can be invaluable for a survivor, and really let them know that you’re available.
  • Criticize for them for what they were wearing, being where they were, not resisting more, etc. The only person responsible for the assault is the perpetrator. Everyone has the basic human right to be free from threats, harassment, or attack. Whatever your student did to survive the situation was the right thing to do.
  • Downplay what happened by saying it wasn’t that bad or that they should forget about it. Let your student tell you exactly how they feel.
  • Sympathize with the abuser. Your student needs your absolute support.
  • Blame your student, your spouse/partner, or yourself. Avoid asking “why” questions as much as possible because these often imply blame.

It can be important to have resources on hand if your loved one lets you know that they have been the victim of sexual violence. Having the right resources an make a difference. There are many great resources out there when it comes to supporting friends and family who have experienced sexual violence on college campus. Below are just few:

You might have questions about when, how or if SAFE can communicate with you about your student and his/her well-being. SAFE is a confidential space, meaning that a student can seek and be provided services and expect not to have that information shared with outside parties, including their support networks.

Like most types of confidential communication, SAFE does not communicate with outside parties without a written, signed consent in place.

On-Campus Resources

Resource Phone Number Confidential vs. Non-Confidential

Counseling and Psychological Services

(415) 338-2208

Confidential

Peggy H. Smith Counseling Clinic

(415) 338-1024

Confidential

 

SF State Psychology Training Clinic

(415) 338-2856

Confidential

 

Student Health Services

(415) 338-1251

Sometimes

Equity Programs & Compliance

(415) 338-2032

Non-confidential

Office of Student Conduct

(415) 405-3960

Non-confidential

Dean on Call

(415) 338-2032

 

Non-confidential

 

Local Off-Campus Resources

Resource Phone Number Confidential vs. Non-Confidential

A Safe Place - Alameda County

(510) 536-7233

 

Confidential

 

Bay Areas Women Against Rape (BAWAR) - Alameda County

(510) 845-7273

Confidential

CORA (Community Overcoming Relationship Abuse) - San Mateo County

(800) 300-1080

Confidential

 

CROC (Corporative Restraining Order Clinic)

(415) 864-1790

Confidential

 

CUAV (Community United Against Violence)

(415) 777-5500

Confidential

La Casa de las Madres

(877) 503-1850

Confidential

 

San Francisco Trauma Recovery/ Rape Treatment Center

(415) 437-3000

Confidential

San Francisco Women Against Rape (SF WAR)

(415) 647-7273

Confidential

 

Victim Services (Crisis Counseling and Advocacy SF DA's Office)

(415) 553-9044

Non-confidential

W.O.M.E.N. Inc. (Women Organized to Make Abuse Nonexistent, Inc.)

(877) 384-3578

Confidential

 

Rape Trauma Services - San Mateo County

(650) 692- RAPE (7273)

Confidential

 

National Resources

Resource Phone Number Confidential vs. Non-Confidential

RAINN-nation’s largest anti-sexual violence organization

 

(800) 656-4673

Confidential

National Domestic Violence Hotline

(800) 799-7233

Confidential

 

National Street Harassment Hotline

 (855) 897-5910

 

Confidential